A pat on the back is only a few inches from a kick in the pants
Don't be irreplaceable, if you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted
The more crap you put up with, the more crap you are going to get
You can go anywhere you want if you look serious and carry a clipboard
When bosses discuss improving productivity, they don't mean themselves
Mother said there'd be days like this, but she never said there'd be so many
Everything can be filed under "Miscellaneous"
Never delay the ending of a meeting or the beginning of a cocktail hour
To err is human, to forgive is not company policy
Important letters that contain no errors will develop errors in the mail
The last person to quit is held responsible for everything that's wrong
There is never enough time to do it right, but always time to do it over
The more pretentious a corporate name, the smaller the organization
If you're good, you get a lot of work. If you're really good, you get out of it
You're always doing something marginal when the boss drops by
People are always available for work in the past tense
If it wasn't for the last minute, nothing would get done
Authority is inversely proportional to the number of pens a person carries
When you don't know what to do, walk fast and look worried
You will always get the greatest recognition for the job you least like
The longer the title, the less important the job
Machines that have broken down will work fine when the repairman arrives
Once a job is fouled up, anything done to improve it makes it worse
All vacations and holidays create problems, except for one's own
Success is just a matter of luck... just ask any failure
Anyone can do any amount of work...
provided it's not the work he's supposed to do
An "acceptable" level of employment means...
the person who accepts it has a job
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